Monday, April 14, 2008

Terrified - MRI Tomorrow

April is turning out to be a busy month on the Bennett front. He has started occupational therapy, seen a new pediatrician, had his vision tested and is going for an MRI tomorrow. All of these things have scared me quite a bit. Here's an update:

Pediatrician: We wanted to see a different pediatrician because the first one was a bit heartless when delivering her diagnosis and then seemed too impatient to answer our questions. It was a half hour appt. that went from "take his socks off, look at him when you talk to him and don't use baby talk" (this was the first 20 minutes) to "oh - he has cerebral palsy - he probably will walk and talk but it will take longer - not until he's two or three - I'll refer him for therapy and an MRI and - I have no other information for you" (the last ten minutes).

Anyway, the new pediatrician didn't really tell us anything we didn't already know, but she was more compassionate and willing to take the time to answer our questions. She was also much nicer to Bennett and had toys in her office. Imagine - toys in a pediatrician's office! I don't think the first Dr. said more than a few words to Bennett and had one toy that I wouldn't have given my dog. In a way that's not a fair comparison as Bowser is quite pampered. Regardless, we were very happy that the second Dr. offered to take Bennett as a patient.

Vision Test: We decided to get Bennett's vision tested at the recommendation of our physiotherapist - just as a precautionary measure. I didn't really have any concerns about his vision but then again, what the hell do I know - I had no idea that my son had cerebral palsy. So much for my mother instinct! We went for the test last week - it went well and the optometrist doesn't have any concerns at this point. It was nice to have some good news.

MRI: This is a pretty standard test for kids with CP. It can rule out other problems and sometimes give more information as to the extent and type of brain injury. I have mixed feelings about this test. Mostly, I am terrified. I think it will be very hard to watch my baby be sedated and stuck in a big machine for an hour. Then, we have to hear the results in a couple weeks. That's even scarier! I don't think I'm ready to hear that the test shows extensive brain damage - but who is ever ready to hear that I guess. I just keep reminding myself, that the results are mostly irrelevant. Many kids with cp have significant brain damage and do very well while others with little damage are more severe. This test can't predict Bennett's future. No matter what Bennett will still be the same little boy and loved just as much. But it's still scary nonetheless, and I am TERRIFIED!

So, that's the update for now. Bennett has reached a new major milestone that we're very excited about! I'll post about that either tomorrow after the MRI or Wednesday. Hopefully, I'll have a video to put up.

In the meantime, can I ask for some good thoughts and prayers to be sent our way tomorrow?



The Ward Family said...

I will be thinking about you guys! Keep us updated! And remember the MRI does not show brain function. It was REALLY hard for me too, but MRI made me feel like I had some closure on the situation. GOOD LUCK!!! Can't wait to see the milestone!!!

Colleen said...

Thoughts and prayers coming your way!

Tomorrow is a big day for my brave little man.

I'm sending all the positive energy I can muster up towards all of you.

All my love,
Auntie Bean.

Antie Gaetanne said...

wI looked at the picture of Barbara looking at the monitor and felt more concern for her than for you - sleeping with a wonderful smile on your face.

Tell your mom and dad to take courage. If tonight does not work out, you will let them sleep on the floor in your room!!! Ha! Ha!

Steps to independance start early, don't they?? Hard to imagine having to let go (to some degree) so early in a little ones life. It is a progression, that's for sure.

Will be thinking of you tomorrow and sending prayers out by the bucket.

Big hug to you and your mummy and daddy!

Auntie Gates

Mummu and Poppa said...

Bennett, your guardian angel is and will always be at your side - doing just what he is meant to do - guard and protect you - from the time you were born.

Today will be especially difficult for Mommy and Daddy - not knowing what the outcome of your MRI will be or what they can do about the outcome when it comes. We all expect and hope for the best.

But, Mommy and Daddy (as we all do) have their own guardian angels. May you all find a special love and peace to surround you today and all upcoming days that you need a 'special hug' or be wrapped in 'God's Blanket of Blessings'.

We have Bennett, Mommy and Dadddy, all our extended families - along with knowledgeable and caring Doctors - to rely on and be thankful for. We offer up a special prayer today for everyone on 'Bennett's Team'.

Don't underestimate your 'special angel' because he is there at all times just-for-you.

We are in your corner, 'Love Muffin', cheering and praying for all of you.

We will see you soon.

Peace, Love, Joy and Prayers
Mummu and Poppa
xxx ooo xxx ooo xxx ooo

Jessica said...

How'd it go?????

Kiera Beth said...

I am thinking of you. The MRI was hard for us, but I am glad that we did it. As you mention, it cannot predict anything, but it was helpful for us to have a general idea of what may be effected.

How did it go? I know what you are going through. The wait time between the MRI and the results was the hardest for us. You are in my thoughts and prayers