Tuesday, June 23, 2009

A Mother or Father Thing?

Yesterday when I picked Bennett up at daycare, I noticed that he had been crying. The caregivers said they didn't know what had happened but that he was with another boy and the crying had started suddenly. They had checked him over but didn't notice anything. They did mention that Bennett kept showing them his left hand. I took a look for myself and quickly noticed teeth marks on his middle finger. It turns out that another kid bit him - the same kid who I saw bite another kid last week.

My initial reaction was, oh well, things like this will happen. The skin wasn't broken and Bennett was quickly returning to his happy self. They filled in an incident report and I felt kind of sorry for the other kid's mother. I'm sure she knows her son has a biting problem and she isn't happy about it. Hopefully the daycare workers will watch the kid more closely so it doesn't happen again.

When Jim came home from work I told him the story - I was pretty sure I knew how he would react. After reassuring me that he wasn't afraid to take on a two year old, and me reassuring him that Bennett was ok and that the daycare would be more careful, talk quickly turned to teaching Bennett how to punch the other kid's lights out - perhaps a toddler boxing course. I kid and exaggerate of course - there's no way Jim could win a fist fight with a two year old - but I found it interesting how our reactions were so different.

I was quick to shrug it off while Jim took it a bit more seriously. Do you think it's a male vs. female thing or maybe just our personalities?


Popcorn House said...

This is very similar to our house. Whenever the kids get hit/bite whatever I say be nice, play by the rules etc. Daniel says hit them back defend yourself. We have agreed to disagree on the situation after eight years of parenting together LOL! And luckily our kids are more "sensitive" and would never hit another kid....but Sammy could change all that who knows. ;o)

I don't think a kid should sit there for a beating of course, but I don't think hitting back is the best course of action either. A tricky situation, cause you don't want your kid to get in trouble!!! I tell our kids to go get a teacher/parent to help. Daniel says if you are being beat up you can't necessarily go for help LOL! HAHAHAHA! Agree to disagree :o)


grandma and grandpa said...

I agree with Popcorn House that it is best to tell the child to seek an adult when bullying occurs. That's what my brain says.
My heart says to cuff the nasty little kid that bit Bennett. Of course, I would't do that and suggesting that Bennett bite back would not be good either! Let's just hope that the daycare workers keep a close eye on the offender and that the parents help their child learn not to bite (but my kid doesn't bite........).
Lots of love, hugs and kisses
Grandma and Grandpa

Anonymous said...

I think i may enroll Bennett in karate


Amy said...

This exact thing happened in our house. I think it is a dad thing to want to teach your kid to defend his or herself. Personally, I was just glad that Maddy was the bite-ee rather than the bite-er.

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Kiera Beth said...

This post cracked me up for a couple of reasons.

1) Reminded me of when I got beat up on the bus for not giving up the back seat. The class bully punched me in the face. I got home and I was crying and my Dad brought me straight downstairs to learn how to hit (I never did learn)

2) I agree with you that it might be a Mom/Dad thing. I find that I tend to be a little more lenient on things at day-care. I taught park & rec for 8 years and I know what happens and how the kids interact. I think that it is good for Little Dude to get some bumps & bruises as he plays with friends. I would expect it if he was home with me. I do know that Drew tends to be more worried when there are bruises

3) I had a great cartoon bubble of poor Jim being pummeled by a 2 year old!

This one is for Jim - I keep hearing that karate is great for kids with one-sided weakness. Tell Barbara that it is to help with the balance and coordination :)